Top Ten Reasons Why Computers Are Better Than Men

10) You don't have to pretend to be afraid of a mouse to make your
    computer feel powerful
9) There's no anxiety the first time a new computer logs you in
8) After an all-nighter, the computer doesn't expect you to get up and
   make breakfast
7) The salesclerk doesn't look at you funny when you buy an anti-virus
   program.
6) If you tell your computer what you want, it *will* follow
   instructions
5) Computers can always boot a floppy
4) If you're not in the same place as your computer, you can telnet
3) No one gets angry if you have accounts on multiple computers
2) The computer doesn't get upset if you leave it on for hours and then
   decide not to run your program after all
1) You can boost your computer's performance simply by giving it a bigger 
   hard disk

Top Ten Reasons Why Computers Are Better Than Women

10) Drag-and-drop won't make your computer angry
9) Computers don't have headaches
8) You can turn your computer on all month long
7) You don't feel slimy after buying a computer
6) Computers can take input from many cables at once
5) There are lots of things you can do to get your computer to go down
4) Computers don't complain if they feel you've logged out too soon
3) You can login to many computers simultaneously
2) Your computer won't think any less of you if your program won't run
1) You can boost your computer's performance simply by giving it more RAM

Lenny Turetsky
Meredith McClurg
March 2, 1994