A young priest wanted to raise money for his church, and seeing that 
     there was a fortune in horse racing, he decided to purchase a horse 
     and enter it in the races. However , at the local auction, the going 
     price for horses was so steep that the priest ended up buying a 
     donkey. The priest figured that since he had the donkey anyway, he may 
     as well go ahead and enter it in the races. Much to his surprise, the 
     donkey came in third. The next day the daily racing form carried the 
     headline:
          
     "PRIEST'S ASS SHOWS."
          
     The priest was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the 
     races again the following day. This time the donkey won! The next day 
     the racing form read:
          
     "PRIEST'S ASS OUT IN FRONT."
          
     The bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he told the 
     priest not to enter the donkey in another race. The newspaper headline 
     that day read:
          
     "BISHOP SCRATCHES PRIEST'S ASS."
          
     This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the priest to get rid 
     of the animal at once. The priest decided to give it to the nearby 
     convent. The headlines that afternoon read:
          
     "NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN."
          
     The bishop fainted! He informed the nun that she would have to
     dispose of the donkey immediately. She found a farmer who was
     willing to buy  the animal for $10. The next day the paper headlines
     stated:
          
     "NUN SELLS HER ASS FOR TEN BUCKS."
          
     They buried the bishop that afternoon, and on the day following the 
     funeral the headlines read:
          
     "TOO MUCH ASS RESPONSIBLE FOR BISHOP'S DEATH." 

	*	*	*	*	*

This one is from the West Coast:

A nun and a priest were traveling across the desert and realized halfway
across that the camel they were using for transportation was about to
die. They set up a make-shift camp, hoping someone would come to their
rescue, but to no avail.  Soon the camel died.

After several days of not being rescued, they agreed that they were not
going to be rescued. They prayed a lot (of course), and they discussed
their predicament in great depth. Finally the priest said to the nun,
"You know, Sister, I am about to die, and there's always been one thing
I've wanted here on earth -- to see a woman naked. Would you mind taking
off your clothes so I can look at you?"

The nun thought about his request for several seconds and then agreed to
take off her clothes. As she was doing so, she remarked, "Well, Father,
now that I think about it, I've never seen a man naked, either. Would
you mind taking off your clothes, too?"

With little hesitation, the priest also stripped. Suddenly the nun
exclaimed, "Father! What is that little thing hanging between your
legs?"

The priest patiently answered, "That, my child, is a gift from God. If I
put it in you, it creates a new life."

"Well," responded the nun, "forget about me. Stick it in the camel!"